Sunday, 19 September 2010

Day 262, on which John gets déjà-vu gets déjà-vu gets déjà-vu gets déjà-vu gets déjà-vu [19.9.10]

Dag to hundrede toogtres. Are you getting déjà-vu with the title? Good - it's not just five typos, heh. Just a funny idea. We'll get onto what it's about in a sec. Until then, refreshments! [refreshments go here] Well, now you're all refreshed, I'd like to announce it's a full month until my birthday! Gasp! A momentous occasion, I'm sure you'll not agree. Really, I shouldn't care much that a number of human-chosen time units elapsed since I was brought into this sordid world. But I get presents, so it's all balanced. Woo, kthxbai.

I watched Groundhog Day again today. The funny thing is, I'd never actually seen the end. After first watching it several years ago, I've watched it a dozen times since but never watched the ending. That's right, I never got to the end of Groundhog Day. If you get the irony associated with the similarity with me not seeing the end of the film and Bill Murray not seeing the end of the day, then woo - gimme a internet high-five. If not, shame on you. Get logic, dude.

The reason why I never saw the end is because it becomes dangerously slow. A mixture of 80s filmmaking and a flabby plot, the film rambles on like some diseased old tramp you'd find on the street. It takes a quarter of an hour for Bill Murray to finally successfully seduce the main lady, when actually a simple montage of thee minutes' length would suffice. Perhaps the director wanted to show how long it took Murray's character to achieve simple steps forward with Ms. Frizzy hair? Hah. Perhaps they just didn't know how to tame the editor.

The ending wasn't too bad, actually. I didn't see all that helpful-Murray stuff coming, I simply thought he'd be honest to Miss Frizzy and get the girl and then the cheesy titles would start scrolling. It's nice that he became a more-rounded individual by the end, learning the piano and how to chip ice etm., it was kinda sweet. But my gawd, the style. I'm sure Harry has no problems with it, being an 80s fan and all, but Madame Frizzeaux (aka. the producer from an 80s-styled hell) does actually dress like a man. And Bill Murray is dressed like a tube. Seriously, I had no idea he had legs 'til he took that bloody trenchcoat off. Yuck.

There's always been a scientific side of Groundhog Day that I've been interested in. One of my friends told me that apparently, if you add up all the days and calculate how many times Bill Murray would have to relive the day to know all those people and play the piano and pull the girl, he'd have been stuck in the loop for millennia. Think about it. That's a heck of a long time. And you could only do so much, it'd have to take under 24 hours. How far could you travel? Would you have enough time when you got there? Probably not. What's the flight time from Pennsylvania to Copenhagen?

Another interesting thing about Groundhog Day is that it's totally owned the market of day-loop films. There really is no others, or no significant others. Groundhog Day totally encompasses everything you could possibly do in a day-loop film. No exceptions. Producers sit in offices in Hollywood saying "hey, what if we make a film about a guy stuck in a day-loop where he saves someone's life because he knows they'll die because he's lived the day before?" just to be met by the answer "Nah, they did that in Groundhog Day." Murray gets the girl, saves someone's life, kills himself (several times), goes mad, gets depressed, gets some random girl, learns more about people, becomes a nicer person, gets life insurance, eats doughnuts, makes a snowman, learns to play the piano, gets drunk, wakes up at 6:00, nearly gets the girl, wakes up at 6:00, learns to love a town that he hated in the start, stops being so egotistic, wakes up at 6:00, predicts the weather, fixes a tire, wakes up at 6:00... and that's only some of the stuff he gets up to. So it's all covered. No similar films and, surprisingly, no remakes. Because it's just about current enough. And if you made a remake, there'd be nothing big enough to change.

So the director must be rubbing his hands with glee. As for the scriptwriter, he'd be rubbing his hands as well, but probably over a tramp's fire in the street because no one gives a shit about scriptwriters. Let alone their salaries.


ps. 'etm' is a term I picked up on Urban Dictionary meaning 'and shit'. As in, etc='et cetera' and etm='et merda'. God knows whether it's accurate or not, but it's funny.

1 comment:

Karrde said...

First of all, you say 'It takes a quarter of an hour for Bill Murray to finally successfully seduce the main lady' like it's a bad thing; that's fifteen more minutes of Bill Murray. You'll watch it, and you better damn well enjoy it 'cause that's fucking Bill Murray, for another quarter of an hour - and that shit doesn't come around every day. Second, the eighties were awesome, so you already predicted my opinion on the fashion.