Wednesday, 26 May 2010

Day 146, on which John explains Rule 34, and all the others too [26.5.10]

Dag hundrede og seksogfyrre. It's only wednesday, but I'm fed up of this week. I'm fed up of school, of revision, of never having any time to do other stuff. Of getting totally confused over Facebook events as they're constantly discussed and times changed etc. Of having a Design & Technology GCSE test which we weren't taught half of. And, most of all, I'm fed up of being tired.

Another addition to JOHNSPACE Photos. 

Two days left, John. Two measly, exam-filled exams. Keep breathing.


OK, our topic of the day is The Rules of the Internet. I discovered them ages ago, but re-read them recently as a result of a Facebook conversation. So what are the Rules? Well, they're a set of 47 'Rules to the Internet' created by an anonymous person on 4chan's /b/ imageboard a few years ago. A lot of them aren't well know, but you may know Rule 34:
Rule 34: There is porn of it, no exceptions.
This is used all over 4chan, mainly on /r/ (the Request board) and /b/ (Random). It mainly pops up when some weirdo anonymous has an odd fetish, but it's also a challenge to /b/tards. And, if no porn can be found:
Rule 35: If no porn is found at the moment, it will be made.
But don't fret, the Rules aren't all about porn. It's just that Rule 34 is the most famous of all the rules. Rules 1 and 2 are often used too:
Rule 1: Do not talk about /b/
Rule 2: Do NOT talk about /b/
It seems like I'm breaking both of them at the moment. Meh, I've broken them loads of times before. In other news, Rules 3, 4, 5 and 6 were famously used in a threat to Scientology from Anonymous. Anonymous, the regular posters on /b/ and other 4chan boards, are one of the biggest anti-Scientology groups.
Rule 3: We are Anonymous.
Rule 4: Anonymous is legion.
Rule 5: Anonymous never forgives.
Rule 6: Anonymous can be a horrible, senseless, uncaring monster.
And the worst thing is, Rule 6 is right. From my small amount of interaction with Anonymous, it was certainly clear that they're the most inconsiderate, uncaring, trolling assholes in the whole of the interwebz.

The Rules also used the popular meme 'TITS or GTFO' as Rule 31, and spawned another not-so-popular meme with rules 39 and 40 - a brilliant argument and comeback.
Rule 39: CAPS LOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL
Rule 40: EVEN WITH CRUISE CONTROL YOU STILL HAVE TO STEER
Indeed, Rule 40 is a great comeback to anyone writing in all-caps who has argued that it's cruise control for cool. Staying on the context of memes, Rule 32 is just a different way of saying the popular meme "pics or it never happened". I'm pretty sure Rule 32 indirectly created the meme.
Rule 32: You must have pictures to prove your statements
Finally, the Rules end with the classic meme (referring to the closing of several pools in the US after people with AIDS used them):
Rule 47: The pool is always closed.
There are several other versions of the rules, but this picture is the original, from when the original Anon posted it on /b/ right at the start. That's the one I like to stick by; 47 rules. Other versions have up to 80 Rules.

Well there you go, an introduction to 4chan and the world of the Rules of the Internet. I think tomorrow I'll return to DeviantArt and give my second opinion (bound to be more condescending).


~John

ps. Sir Nadroj has crossed the line. Sure, he's a good builder, but stuff like this is too stylised and philosophical to be good. His style gets dull after a short time.

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